(Source: late-whispers)
Tracks
i feel like i annoy everyone that doesnt start the conversation with me first
cancerousmexicanfetusrapewhistle:
One time when I was little I ran away from home because I was upset but I just took left turns because I wasnt allowed to cross the street so I ended up back at home it was really embarrassing
a kid from my school just got expelled today for pretending to be russian for 8 months. he pretended he couldn’t read, write or talk english he did good in all his classes because he had all the teachers and principles convinced he just moved from russia, so they didn’t make him do any work
i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
oh my god you managed to one up john green.
reblog if u were on tumblr before yahoo bought it
IT’S LITERALLY BEEN LIKE A DAY AND WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TRYING TO ACHIEVE WITH THIS POST
only a true tumblrite would understand. you just outed yourself as a yahooligan
YAHOOLIGAN
my mother must be so proud of her lazy, rebellious, anxiety-ridden, depressed child
your mother must be so proud of her strong, smart child who lives each day dealing with anxiety and depression and still holds on
oh man wow
how to give a good handjob
- bop it
- pull it
- twist it
- harder
- better
- faster
- stronger
You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!Cha cha real smooth
none of you ever touch a penis
stop-bitching-start-a-revolution:
Cosmo tip: When he pulls out his dick, perform the musical Put That Thing Back Where It Came From Or So Help Me
(Source: lalocadeloswaffles15)
